SUMMARY OF THE SHOW
Gail Hamilton is an internationally-recognized motivational speaker, a powerful singer who has sung leading roles in two major opera productions and is the author of the book Soaring into Greatness. Gail is also totally blind. Born ten weeks premature and weighing a mere 2.5 pounds, Gail and her twin brother lived in separate incubators for six weeks with continual 100% pure oxygen. Though her twin was not affected, this high oxygen level damaged Gail’s eyes and left her with partial vision. It was during elementary school that her eyes developed cataracts; decreasing her sight to total blindness. Gail has experienced abuse, career discriminations, suicidal ideations, loss, and co-dependency, yet despite this, Gail has transformed from being a victim of her circumstances to becoming the creator of her destiny. Gail is with me today to talk to me about how she believes that if we change the way we see, we change the way we live! TOPICS THAT I DISCUSS WITH GAIL:
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SHOW TRANSCRIPT
Claire Rogers I'm Claire Rogers, and you're listening to Boot Camp for the Mind & Soul, the podcast that gives you an inner workout. Before we get started, remember, just like in a gym where you may not be able to use all the equipment; pick up what you can in this episode, and leave behind what you can't. Your inner workout starts now. Gale Hamilton is an internationally recognized motivational speaker, a powerful singer who had leading roles in two major operas, and is the author of the book, Soaring into Greatness. Gail is also totally blind. Born 10 weeks premature and weighing a mere two and a half pounds, Gail and her twin brother, lived in separate incubators for six weeks with continual 100% oxygen. Her twin was not affected by this high oxygen level, but it damaged Gail's eyes and left her with partial vision. It was during elementary school that her eyes developed cataracts, decreasing her sight to total blindness. Gail has experienced abuse, career discriminations, suicidal ideations, loss and codependency. Yet despite this, Gail has reformed from being a victim of her circumstances to becoming the creator of her destiny. Gail is with me today to talk to me about how she believes that if we change the way we see, we change the way we live. So welcome Gail and thank you for joining Boot Camp for the Mind & Soul podcast. Gail Hamilton Thank you so much for having me. Claire Rogers 01:29 So let me dive straight in. Gail, I have researched you extensively and your background, and I find your story fascinating. Can you talk to me about your experience of losing your sight in elementary school? Gail Hamilton When I was in fourth grade, I had partial sight and I loved to read and ride bikes and watch TV with my limited vision because I had cataracts, with what I thought was quote normal, and then all of a sudden, in the beginning of the fifth grade, I started running into walls, and that happened over the summer, and falling into trash cans and riding my bike into an embankment and crashing and burning and I kept saying to myself what is going on? And, and I can remember some of the last things I saw which was the world's fair in New York City in 1964, and the waterfall on the big globe and it was really cool. And so, I was confused by why all this stuff was going on, and what's is weird about sight, is it's located visual side, and in an internal site, the same part of your brain as the optic nerve. And so as my external site, decreased my internal vision increased so I was confused because in my head, I still saw, yet outwardly I ran into walls. I'm a kid and my parents aren't talking about it because they don't talk about it. And so how can I figure out what was going on? So I took a piece of paper in fifth grade and it had raised lines because I went to a school for the blind. And I wrote my name on the piece of paper and then I wrote a line from the L in Gail down to the bottom of the page, and my theory was if I could see that line, I would know I had sight. If I couldn't see that line, I'd know I was blind. And so I wrote my name, and I did the L and drew the line down and I couldn't see it, and I was devastated. And there's no one to talk to about it. And so, I held that grief in until like eighth grade, and then I exploded one day over the dinner table - you don't even know I can't see! Then they took me to our doctor who said oh you have cataracts. So it was a hard go through that, especially with no support, and no validation. Claire Rogers So how old were you when you actually lost all of your sight? Gail Hamilton 11 Claire Rogers While you were navigating your blindness, at the same time, your parents drank, you were verbally discounted and teased and physically beaten by your brothers. How did you navigate your home life, as well as your new reality of blindness? How did you navigate that? Gail Hamilton I went internal with everything; I was pretty depressed in grade school and in high school. You couldn't really get me out of my shell. I wouldn't talk in class, I wouldn't talk at all, I wouldn't talk anywhere because I just didn't feel heard and validated. I think the two things I would say, during that time that kept me functional would be the love of my grandma who always saw me as a person first and my disability second, and music - I had a fabulous piano teacher back then too. And she did the same thing, between them and some of the, I went to a Catholic High School - and some of the nuns in high school, they saw me and validated me as a person first. I was so far behind though in high school, it just wasn't funny, because of the difference between the school for the blind education and regular schools education. But music and my grandma were the things that kept me going. Claire Rogers And so, did you have any friends that you had before you lost your sight, did they continue to be your friend or did it kind of overnight, change your world by becoming blind? Gail Hamilton It happened in fifth grade, so I stayed at that school for four more years, so those friends stayed. And then when I went to high school, all that went away. And then the friends I did have and the friends I had no matter where I was and sort of to this day, as well, not always, but a lot of times, my friends would be the friends for better or for worse, they kind of feel sorry for me or they're my friends while I'm at school, but when I go home, they're not my friends. I mean they just discounted. I had a woman a few years back. Somebody said to her, what's does Gail do over Christmas? And my friend said, and this was just couple of years back, I don't know I never think about her. So she told me, and I was like, wow, so I'm in people's vision when I'm there but when I'm not, I'm not. And so they don't think that I can go to movies or ice skate or climb the Sydney Harbor Bridge or whatever it is, you know, and I had to convince them that I'm quote, normal. And that's kind of sad but there you have it. Claire Rogers I'm wondering if it comes from two places. Does it come from ignorance, and also could it be that people are reluctant to ask you to do things because they're scared that it will come across as insensitive? Gail Hamilton Probably both, yeah. Being blind, I'm always educating people that I can do the same as they can do. And when I have a seeing eye dog, I'm always educating them about the dog and so no matter what it is, it's constant educating. They just don't know because they've never been around somebody who was blind and I think blindness, like any other disability is the hardest one because people just can't see what it's like to be without sight because our world so visual, and they just can't imagine me getting dressed or putting on makeup or going to the bank or whatever it is and that fear they project onto me. Which is not really fair, but they don't know, so I’ve had to educate. Claire Rogers How did you learn to navigate that as a small child? Did you have a support system that taught you how to navigate being blind and being discounted? Gail Hamilton No, just Grandma during my grade school years, she would probably be the only one that loved me, when I got into high school it was my piano teacher, like I said, there's always been one champion in my whole life that's kind of seen me for who I am. I had a college teacher that was there. So, no, but I had lots of therapy later on life (laughs) . But as far as at the time, no real people to say hey you're normal this is what it is. Now I belong to a couple of organizations for the blind and I have a couple of friends who are blind, and especially one and she and I always talk about this kind of stuff. Claire Rogers I actually I have a bit of segue slightly from what I was going to ask you. I have an experience with dealing with people who don't have sight. It was a few years ago and I saw a sign in a local pub, and it was for a book club, and it had a sign for the book to read and the date to show up and I thought, well I love to read I'm definitely going to go there. So I read the book and I showed up on the respective date, and when I got there, there were about 10 people in the room and there were also about 10 dogs lined up along the wall and I remember being slightly confused because I don’t have a dog and I didn't know I was supposed to bring a dog. And then it dawned on me that they were seeing eye dogs. And I remember thinking, oh, but it didn’t say on the flyer that it was for people who couldn't see, but I joined a book club and I loved it, but I remember thinking actually that it was a very important lesson for me that, no it didn't say on the on the flyer that the people couldn't see, they don't have to declare that just like I don't have to declare that I can see. And I remember being humbled by that and thinking you know what, that was a good experience that I just assumed that it would be declared, that this book club was for people who couldn't see. Gail Hamilton (laughs) That's cool. I've had similar experience when I've taught piano. If I tell people I'm blind beforehand the mother brings the student in, then sometimes they'll go, whoa, how do you do that and how do you teach him. And then there are other times they go, oh cool. So it just depends on the person's fear level and their background and some people have stayed. Some people have left, you know after the one introductory free lesson. Claire Rogers Going back to your story, sorry I segued there slightly, but going back to your story, I was reading on your website that you said that when you lost your sight you kind of went internal and you really explored your imaginary and spiritual life, and I was wondering if with you could explain that to me. Gail Hamilton I think it came naturally - I don't know if I knew it at the time. I learned to see people from the inside out, and obviously I couldn't judge them on their appearance, and I don't even know when I had partial sight if I had that much sight that I could judge people on their appearance or not. And so, it forced me to see people's hearts and their souls. And if their words were congruent with their tone of their voice and their behavior and their actions and all that, and I think that came little by little, gradually, and I just sort of started learning to develop that part of me instead of basing it from the outside and instead basing it from the inside out. Claire Rogers So would you say that - have you become spiritual or is it more like an innate sense of self? Gail Hamilton I think both, I think then later on when I totally got it about spirituality and all that, which was like 10 or so years ago, that it just solidified and maybe I had it all along, I just didn't know it. And, probably based on my grandma, but I think both. So can you describe how you become spiritual, and what does spirituality mean to you? Gail Hamilton Wow. There's a good one. You know, I say grounding in God and sword and spirits. So you know I certainly believe there's something bigger than me that's out there, there's a love force, a universal force that we're all connected that we're all one, that there certainly is good in the world and the good outweighs the bad there is good no matter what goes on and what happens, it's all in Divine Order and all good. My philosophy is not only just a philosophy, but it's also who I am as a person. My philosophy says I believe my desire to fly must be bigger than my fear of falling, vision is internal not external, it's guided by my heart not my eyes, in order to be free to fly, I must want my dream, feel my dream and believe that my dream will come true, most importantly I must live my dream. I'm the creator of my destiny. The composer of my symphony, and I choose to live a life of greatness. So it's all about attitude, it's all about faith and it's all about action. It's all about not just believing but knowing that I'm okay, that I have a purpose and it is a divine reason for me to be here. And that my purpose is to touch other people's lives, it's to educate, it is to empower, it is to reach out and say, no matter what's going on, you're okay. And I totally believe all of that just from the core of my being, that I'm okay. I don't have to be as good as any other person who has sight, I can just be me, blind Gail with all my other characteristics, and I'm just fine. And I'm good, and I'm okay. I don't know if that answer that. Claire Rogers No, it does, it is beautiful, I completely agree with you, it aligns with my own philosophy of life. So, you've my sense from hearing this is that you've got a deep connection to your inner world, and a deep connection to your innate sense of self and I'm just wondering, for our listeners who may be perhaps lacking that themselves, do you have any advice on how they could cultivate that? Gail Hamilton Trust yourself. You know, for me, I've always done my passion, whether it was singing operas or writing my book or building my Habitat house or climbing that Sydney Harbor Bridge last year. I've always done my passion. So you know, I do have some advice. I based it on sort of like the five senses except I grew to seven. See your vision, so you know where you want to go, focus your eyes on that. Listen to your inner voice. So your spirituality, your God, your divine, but focus, listen to that voice inside you because that voice is really speaking to you and telling you what you should or should not be doing. Speak your truth, that’s really important. Don't speak what you think others should hear or just because you know best. You know when you're in alignment. And when you're not. Follow your heart. Do that passion. Reach out to others, that your hands. Walk with confidence and purpose, and then live a life of greatness, tune into the inner self and live a life of greatness. So, then beyond that faith, attitude, action, those are my three main things. Claire Rogers I love that; I really love that. In particular what I love is that you say listen to your inner voice. I agree with that, that's very important. But a lot of us have learned to not listen to that inner voice, we can live in autopilot mode, we're in a society that's full of distractions. I'm just wondering what do you do to listen to your own inner voice? Gail Hamilton I do a lot of journaling, that really helps me every day. Mainly every day I journal, I love to journal. And that usually ends up with gratitude, you know, doing gratitude, because there's so many things you can be thankful for compared to focusing on that negative. But journaling, meditating, praying, taking time to be quiet. Just to lay flat on the floor and just rest there for five minutes and breathe, breathing is really good. I love walking, no matter what the weather is. I love walking, it sort of connects me to God and nature and it's like, ah, here's what's going on today in the world. Music helps me sometimes, just listening to music or making my own, but songwriting, whatever. So it could be those things, or it could be gardening, or it could be cooking, or it could be, which I'm not good at all so that's not the one that brings me passionate and calm, but whatever brings you peace, and whatever brings you joy. Those are the two things you're supposed to be doing. If you don't have peace and joy in your life, then you are out of alignment. And so, then you have to stop, breathe and say okay, what's what. What don't I want what am I not liking here. What do I like what do I want. And then when you find out what you want, then go do that thing, because joy and peace and love are the three things we're here to do. So whatever equates to doing those is what you're supposed to be doing. Claire Rogers Gail, I read somewhere that you credit, Richard Bach's story about Jonathan Livingston Seagull as being an inspiration to you. I truly love this book. And if it was up to me, I would make this required reading in every school around the world. But before we carry on, for those listeners who are unaware of the story of Jonathan Livingston Seagull, it's all about a seagull that doesn't want to be a seagull. He wants to find fulfilment and a higher purpose in life, and he seeks to become the best at what he loves to do. So Gail I was just wondering, given that you love this story, can you share with me how you came across the story in the first place and how it's helped you personally? Gail Hamilton Absolutely. My grandma gave me a record, I think when I graduated from high school. Back in the days when there were records right? (laughs). And this record had a reading of Jonathan on it with the background of an orchestra. It was so beautiful ;I still have it and I was so moved by it. I was so depressed and so unhappy in high school. And I thought, wouldn't it be cool to be a bird? I've never seen a bird fly, but it'd be so cool to be a bird, to be so free to be untethered by these earthly gravelling scrapping for food on this shore. And I felt like an outcast by my parents, just like Jonathan, and I thought, there just must be a better way. And maybe that was my introduction to spirituality. I just knew that there had to be something else. So I've always longed to fly, and my favorite quote from Jonathan is your whole body from wingtip to wingtip is nothing more than a thought in a form that you can see break the chains of your thoughts, and you break the chains of your body to. How amazing is that statement? I think that's when I started learning that our thoughts become who we are. Besides therapy and reading some other books later in life. And that totally transformed my life - it came from Jonathan, that what we think, so we create. And so if I say I'm old, then by golly, I'm going to be old. If I say I'm fat I'm gonna be fat. And that's how I got totally my house, my Habitat for Humanity house, built. That's how I became Miss Colorado Senior America, that's how I got the book and that's how I got to climb the Sydney Harbor Bridge, all those four things was because I believed it to my core that this was going to happen, and this is who I am. It's totally shaped my life and if I'm feeling down, sometimes I go get the CD or I think I have it in my computer now as an mp3. I put that on. So it's a fabulous little CD, I don't know if that's out there in the world anymore but it's certainly a great book. Claire Rogers Oh it's a fantastic book, and you know what, I've actually got it on my desk and if I ever need a bit of push to get regained my gumption that's my go to. Your grandmother gave it to you. So were you a child when you first heard about it? Gail Hamilton No, I was in high school, I was graduating from high school. Claire Rogers So actually I just want to say to the listeners, you don't need to be a child, you can be an adult it is applicable to anybody. I would highly recommend reading it. So now, Gail actually I want to go back to what I said in the beginning of your introduction which is how you've transformed from being a victim of your circumstances to becoming the creator of your destiny. Can you describe to me how you were able to make that transition because I'm guessing like most people that didn't happen overnight. Gail Hamilton No, no, I was a pretty good victim (laughs) and some people who read my book, say ah, it's so victimy, but the ending is good. So, the first 50 years were horrible, I didn't say that my thoughts created my reality - I had some cool things like the operas that I performed in, and I had the mentors that helped mold me and show me the love to keep me moving forward. But I certainly didn't have the mindset, I certainly was suicidal, like for 10 years of my life, and thank goodness for therapy and thank goodness for her believing in me. So at the end of all the therapy and kicking and screaming out all the abuse and all the hard stuff that had been in my life. At the end of that, that's when my therapist said, you need to read the book, Your life is waiting, and besides Jonathan (Livingstone Seagull), it effect my life, and then I got it about that my thoughts and that I'm responsible for who I am. And yeah, it was slow. I mean it took her 10 years to get it through my head. But, finally, after 10 years, I kind of got it and I went oh, and then once I read that book, and started practicing focusing on gratitude’s and focusing on anything but the negativity; I tell you, my life overnight switched pretty much. I mean within a couple of years, you know, that's when I got the house and I wrote the book and all that happened after I read that book, but not because I read it, but because I took action, and did it, you know, it's not just reading it. Claire Rogers Exactly. There's a difference between knowledge and applied knowledge in my opinion. So what made you decide to seek out therapy in the first place. If you were in the depths of depression and things weren’t working for you, what gave you the push to think I need to change things? Gail Hamilton I was in grad school for a psychology degree. I think the classes were way above my head and I had no idea what was going on, so that got me into therapy initially. And then, the more I delved and more I uncovered the sexual abuse from my family and my father and my brother that I just kind of, you know, I just stayed, and I was the kind of person that I just didn't want to, and maybe this goes to your applied knowledge, I didn't want to, I equated it to like a car that I just didn't want to polish the outside to go, oh that's so pretty. I was determined not to stay depressed; I knew there had to be something more, maybe that Jonathan (Livingstone Seagull) was still nudging me from the inside "there's more, there's more". And so, I was the kind of client that I got out of the car. I went to the front, I open the hood, I took out the engine, I took it totally apart. I cleaned every single piece of that engine, and then I put it back together, stuck it in the car, polish the car and got back in and drove it. I wanted to be happy. I've been so unhappy my whole entire life with my grade school and high school and, and I didn't know why I was so happy. I didn't know it was the abuse or maybe I saw myself as different than instead of the same as everyone else. I believed that any sighted person was more valuable than me, which my parents stuck in my head. So, what a thing for me to live with my entire life? So, the therapy helped me realize that I'm just as valuable as anybody else. I just don't have to eyes that work, which is okay. Claire Rogers That’s amazing - I think it is beautiful; that actually helps me segue into what I want to talk about which is discrimination. You have faced career discrimination, and I imagine lots of forms of discrimination by society at large. And I want to know if you can talk to me about the forms of discrimination you face. And what we as a society can do better in terms of recognizing people with disabilities and seeing them as valuable as equal members of society? Gail Hamilton Yeah. Very good. One of my first ones, and most impactful ones was when I was in grad school, and I was one of the seven top singers in the country to this competition, I mean to go towards the finals of this competition, which a big honor we had a stack, two feet high of music, and I had to sing an opera, and work with an orchestra and two recital programs which is immense amount of songs that I had to know. I get on stage, and the National judge says after 10 minutes and I was allowed 15. That's it. She only had me sing my easiest songs rather than the more difficult, challenging ones. And I knew when I walked off on the arm of my accompanist that she discriminated. So he went up several hours later, because we both were in tears and devastated because I was the better singer. And it was for Fulbright scholarship for Pete's sakes, and so he went up to the judges room and said, why didn't she get it? and she wrote on the top of my critique sheet how can you have a career in singing when you're blind? I was devastated. I didn't know about fighting. I didn't know about discrimination. I didn't know about standing up for my rights. I took it because I had that belief that a sighted person was more valuable than me. I took her word as God. That totally changed my life. And that's probably why I went into psychology and counselling, but they discriminated too, and they said how can you be a therapist since you're blind, but by then I started psychotherapy, I started to fight and I realized I had a voice, and I realized that I am valuable. So I fought and I took him to mediation I won but that was, that is a whole other big description. I've been discriminated because my dogs. I was in Santa Fe, New Mexico once, and this was 30 years ago, and they wouldn't let me into a restaurant, they wouldn't let me into a bakery, they wouldn't let me into a grocery store, or a quilting company, all four or five of them in that week said you can't come in here because the dog. And sometimes I walked out and said okay fine, because I didn't have, at that time, my voice. But now, I'd go. I don't think so. And I have had some in Kansas that have said, you can't come in here with your dog, and I just bring up the little rules and I go over and say look up Kansas and check it out see what it says about seeing eye dogs, and they go, oh yeah, okay. So yeah, what can we do? Discrimination is so subtle too nowadays - you know they can't come right out and say it; sometimes they do. But you know, treat the person as you'd want to be treated with respect and love and dignity and kindness. We are not less than. I think holding us up to high expectations, instead of low expectations would be a good thing. So hold us up to high expectations, expect me to do the same as you'd expect of your other friend who isn't disabled, you know, and we will tell you if we can or cannot do whatever it is. When I was in Miss America, the state pageant directors said, well, we're gonna have everybody else stand on this little platform, and they'll get their picture taken. But we won't have you do that. And I said, well, why not? well because you're blind. I said show me what everybody else is doing. And so she did. I said, well here's how I'll do it. So we worked out a way I. That's how I've usually done it, even building of my house, or whatever it is. How's everybody else going to do it, then leave it up to me how I am going to adapt, because I know how I have adapted my own life, to everything. So, don't put your limitations on me. Claire Rogers Going back to what I said earlier, so it's basically, don't presume you can't do something and don't presume it's insensitive to ask you the question to do something. It's okay to ask you. It's not insensitive. It's not insensitive to ask. Gail Hamilton Absolutely. Totally ask me. If it's in your in your head, ask, you know, do you think, she lost on the corner of the street, I asked me, and I'll tell you. Does she want help across the street or not? Ask me, because there's some days I might. Some days I might not. Just ask me and I'll tell you if I can go to a movie or whatever it is. Just ask. Claire Rogers So can I ask as well, so say for example, I have actually seen this before. I’m in a coffee shop and I see somebody who is blind. Is it okay to go to them and say, do you need help, because again, I guess I have been in that situation where I thought oh well, I shouldn't presume that they need help, but what if they do? Gail Hamilton Right. Well, you can ask them if they do. I mean sometimes I won't, sometimes I want to be independent, and I'm just like, yeah, let me find my own coffee, I'm just gonna go for it. And then some days maybe I'm having a hard day and maybe you know it'd be nice for a stranger to come and ask, you know, so if it's in your head, ask because I'll let you know that day if I do or don't need you. And you know the other thing is, there are angry blind people, and there are nice blind people just like there are angry and nice sighted people. And so don't judge all the blind people just if you had a bad encounter with one of us. Maybe we were having a bad day, and we're sorry, and you know that's just the way it is, and we all have them, but don't judge me from some other experience you’ve had, and vice versa. You know, come and ask me I'll tell you and most likely I'm going to be nice. Claire Rogers Cool. I think that's fantastic advice. So my sense is that from what you've said you've got a deep innate sense of self that you didn't have when you were younger, but you do now, and you've got a burning determination to achieve all that you set your mind to. And the reason why I've come to this sense is because you've achieved a Master of Music Degree in Vocal Performance, a Master of Arts degree in Transpersonal Psychology, you built your own Habitat for Humanity house, achieved fourth runner up for Miss America and you've recently climbed the Sydney Harbor Bridge. Where does that burning desire to achieve all that you set your mind to come from, and can you give some advice to our listeners on how they can cultivate that burning desire? Gail Hamilton It I'm going to meld it into one thing, I think it's this thing, listening to that inner voice, which is the guidance from source, God, Spirit, whatever you want to call it, divine, listening to that, and following that. So I think the first step would be to stop to breathe and maybe write down a list of what you don't want, what you don't like in your life. I don't like being depressed, I don't like being at a job I don't like, my family, I don't like this, I don't like that, and maybe you do that for a long time, but things can come and then maybe you go back to that list and you write what would be the flip side of that. Well if I don't like being sad well, I must want to be happy. You know, if I don't like my job or I must want to do something else. Well what does bring me joy. You know, and if it's if it's vegging out in front of TV for a while, okay that could be where you are for a while, but then after a while it's like, well, now what. Maybe go back to what you liked doing at five years old. I've always liked to draw. I've always liked to hike. I've always liked to do this or that, I've always liked cooking, whatever that it is, there is that little kernel of something that you've always liked that brings you joy, and just start doing that little thing, no matter how small. And then the gratitude’s I think would help too. But the burning desire, it's in there, it's already there. You just have to figure out a way to uncover it, if it's journaling, if it's talking to people. And for me, you know that's partly how mine came unfolded by taking therapy. You know I love music I still love music. I love to write, go write a book, Okay, I love talking well, why don't you go be a speaker, you know I just keep doing the things I like. And somehow, it just keeps working out for me and I've never done. I can't say never, I've had a couple part time jobs I hated. But, but even then, I didn't hate them, because I loved connecting with the people, but I've always done the thing I'd like to do. And I've kind of let God, the universe, work out the details. And so I just keep doing what brings me joy. Claire Rogers Wonderful. So on the flip side, I think, even the most determined amongst us can fall down with our motivation or unexpected life events happen for, for example, COVID, and our greatest intentions fall by the wayside. And I'm just wondering, do you ever lose your determination and if so, how do you pivot in order to regain your focus. Gail Hamilton Absolutely. I'm just as human as anybody else and I could go eat a jar of peanut butter quicker than anybody I know (laughs), but at the end of the day the peanut butter is not going to help. For the first couple months (of the Covid pandemic) because I was speaker I thought, what am I going to do? I kept journaling. And I kept going. So I gathered a group of my favorite kind of career coaching people together and personal friends. And I said, give me some guidance because you have some expertise. I sometimes equate it to either learning piano or climbing a mountain. You have to have a mentor, somebody out there that's gone before you, you have to have the desire to do whatever that is. So, take piano, you have to have the desire to play piano, then you have to have the tools. So you have to have the piano, or keyboard, you have to have music. And those are just some of the tools. And you have to find a mentor, somebody that's been there before you, that can guide you on your way to teach you how to learn the skills of play piano. Then do you have to practice every day. And keep doing it with your mentor and their guidance and then you have to eventually have the faith that, yes, I can do this because yesterday I was just playing Mary had a Little Lamb, and today I'm playing with Moonlight Sonata. That's pretty cool. And then you have to celebrate when you get to the top of the mountain when you learn your piece, you get to have a little party, I used to call them student parties, and you get to celebrate that. So, for those who don't have the passion, or the desire and you don't know what that is, just kernel it down to the joy thing. Know that you have that spark, follow that and then if you don't know how, because when I wrote my book, I came up all these excuses I don't know how to write a book. And my therapist says, you don't have to know the how. All you have to do is have the desire. And so I did, I wrote for two hours a day for 10 years, writing and rewriting and 10 edits later and she said, there'll be an editor that can fix everything at the end of it. So there's always a mentor. There's somebody that's been there before you. And there's always somebody who can teach you. Claire Rogers So basically if we ever lose our way, your answer is, ask for help, get a mentor and get somebody to guide you on your way again. Gail Hamilton Right. It could be a therapist. It could be as a spiritual person, it could be somebody in your field, or it can just be a friend. Claire Rogers So you were just talking about your book. Your book is called Soaring into Greatness of which former President Jimmy Carter writes, and I quote "It’s a beautiful story of someone who has overcome a physical handicap and change it into a force that is an inspiration." Well you know what, if that's not an endorsement to read a book I don't know what is! So I need to ask you, how did you get a former president to come across your story... I mean do you have friends in high places? Gail Hamilton (laughs) Nope. Nope, I just wrote him because I had a Habitat house and I knew he was big into Habitat and I just wrote him and I had somebody help me find the address...I just wrote him and said, hey, I've written this book and would you endorse it, he said, yeah. So, just ask! Claire Rogers Exactly, the powerful lesson there is, you don't ask, you don't get right? That is absolutely fantastic, and I think, you know, don't have a fear of rejection. Gail Hamilton Yeah. Who cares if he says no. Claire Rogers I think it's amazing. So, before we wrap up, can you tell our listeners, what your book is all about. And what they'll get from reading it. Gail Hamilton My book is the story of my life which you've heard some of today. Going from the victim to the creator, it talks about my childhood growing up with the parents that I had, all the schools, all the discriminations, singing operas, it goes into relationships - all the codependency. I divulge everything - everything you'd ever want to know about me is in that book, up to the Miss America Pageant. What you'll get? I think I say in the back of the book, if I can provide a blind person insight that's hopeless & give some hope. I have a section at the back of the book. Totally worth reading called pearls of wisdom. It's written to people that maybe have a disabled child, it's written to parents of blind people, it's written from the blind person's perspective. I have all these little paragraphs from each kind of thing in my life to give them a little bit of hope and inspiration. It's for friends of people who are blind, and so if I can bring you hope that you know that you're not alone, that there is a way, there's always a way through the challenge, and that I've made it through the other side, and I faced some hard stuff. And I know it's hard, even COVID is, I don't have some issues some other people have, but I know there's a way through it and all things are possible. Every single thing. I'm not going to see in this lifetime, so you go you're not gonna see. All right, yeah, I'm not gonna see, I have prosthetics. But I don't have to see to make my life work. There is a way of coping with my disability that makes my life work. So just a way to cope with whatever it is, make life joyful and abundant and prosperous and peaceful and to accept it, you have to keep moving forward, because there's a reason for you to be here, and there's hope. And there's value in your life. Claire Rogers Oh, that's amazing. I think that's a great way to end, so Gail thank you so much for joining Boot Camp for the Mind & Soul. I very much appreciate you and our discussion. You can purchase Gail Hamilton's book Soaring into Greatness through Amazon, and you can learn more about Gale and you can contact her via her website which is https://soaringintogreatness.com Gail Hamilton Thank you. Thank you so much for having me. Claire Rogers That concludes this week's episode of Boot Camp for the Mind & Soul. Don't forget to rate and review and subscribe. Tune back in next Wednesday for next week's episode. If you have any questions about this episode, or anything about the podcast, then don't forget to visit, https://www.itopiacoaching.com
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